Recognizing and Managing Emotions

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Children enjoy feeling happy. When children feel happy they generally act out in positive ways by smiling, sharing kind words and using a positive demeanor.  But at times, children experience more uncomfortable feelings that are not as easy to handle.  Some of these uncomfortable feelings include frustration, sadness, confusion, disappointed, anger, or embarrassment.  A child may experience these feelings because he/she is being teased, hurt or threatened, or maybe this is happening to someone they care about. A child may experience an uncomfortable feeling because he/she lost at a game, feel something is unfair, got a bad grade, is having difficulty understanding, is feeling left out, etc…. 

Children experience these feelings in different ways and for different reasons, it is a normal part of life. Some signals that the body gives off during an uncomfortable feeling may be headache, stomach ache, shortness of breath, crying, tight jaw, tightening of muscles, face turning red, and/or clenching of the fists.  

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When children have difficulty coping with uncomfortable feelings they might react in negative ways such as teasing, calling names, acting out aggressively, or withdrawing from others.  It is important to help children identify more appropriate ways of managing their uncomfortable feelings.  Some positive coping strategies are: deep belly-breathing; counting and positive self-talk. Engaging in physical activity, drawing, taking a walk, taking a bubble bath, talking to a trusted adult and/or listening to music can be healthy alternatives to deal with these uncomfortable emotions.

To help your child recognize and understand how emotions work, a great family activity is to watch the recent movie ‘Inside Out’. Click to watch a short trailer.

Below are some other useful links to videos and articles related to understanding and managing emotions:

• Sesame Street Videos: ‘Grover Sings About Feelings’ and ‘Name that Emotion With Murray!’.
• Second Step: ‘Calm it Down’ Song (Lyrics and Dance)
• ‘5 Steps to Managing Big Emotions’
• ‘Healthy Ways For Kids to Manage Their Emotions’

Thank you,

Carla Maia

Bobbie Neubern

Lower School Counselors